In this journey of life, we spend a lot of time trying to find our way. How can we be more successful, be a better parent, child, or worker? When will I reach the goals I’ve set for myself? Unfortunately, life flies by so quickly, that real strides toward those goals, on a day to day basis, can be almost impossible to reach. Too many things happen in an instant. Too many obstacles and unforeseen challenges throw themselves in our way. Most importantly, a lot of us don’t know who we really are, or we fool ourselves into believing we are something we are not.
Then we read cliche sayings, or look to others to say and do things that will inspire us to make the necessary changes. It’s good, and even necessary, to find something to hold onto. A saying is good fuel, but you have to take care of the vehicle receiving the fuel. Understand its needs, and know how to maintain it. A beat up car with a full tank of gas, that hasn’t had an oil change, or tune up is useless. So how do you maintain your vehicle?
The first step is to do a full diagnostic. This sounds difficult, and may seem as if requires a lot of energy or constant self awareness. However, that’s not true. There’s a saying that says, look in the mirror and see if you like what you see. In my opinion, that’s not realistic. That doesn’t allow you really get in touch with who you are. So, who are you? You are that person, that when laying down to sleep at night, that is consumed with thoughts of the day past and the days ahead. When you are laying in a quiet room, with no distractions, you are your thoughts. Are you happy with who you are? Are you happy with how you have been handling your relationships; your job; your finances? Can you, without outside judgement, eliminate the evil or self fulfilling thoughts and honestly think about your actions or inactions? Can you think about all of this without making irrational excuses and say, I feel good about this or that? That is who you are.
Some people meditate to get a bead on themselves. It’s not an easy thing to do; I’ve tried. But I can understand the concept. Clear your mind of distractions and self evaluate. If you feel good about who you are and what you have done to get closer to the person you want to be, then you are on the right path. If you know you could do more; say more; act more…then it’s up to you to do the things that will allow for that. But only you can be the true judge of that.
Along those same lines, if you are truly happy with yourself and truly happy with the energy you are putting out into the world (without hate, selfishness, etc…) and someone doesn’t accept you, then get rid of them. Finding yourself includes accepting yourself. The things you need to make better, make them better. Don’t just go onto social networks and claim that today is a new day, and things will change. It’s not that easy. Evaluate how you feel about you regularly (daily may be too much). Do the self diagnostic, and then begin to fix what you can.
Lastly, don’t try to fix everything at once. Each area of improvement may require a few steps. Identify the few things that you need to do, and work on each part. Otherwise, you’re only setting yourself up for failure.
I hope this helps carry you through another week. Thanks for walking with me even as I ramble; writing these words, are therapeutic for me. Until next week.