I want to break down me-time, for those of you who love having me-time like I do. If you have a friend or loved one who has had a hard time understanding, while you have had difficulty explaining, point them in my direction. I think I found a way to convey the message.
First, why am do I feel the need to explain. Over the course of my adult life (young adult to present), I’ve inadvertently offended many of people who didn’t quite understand my desire to have me-time. I can’t say that it’s ever been a huge deal, but it’s left a few with a bitter taste…enough to think that I had some offensive desire to be away from them. I think before I knew better, I used to try and reassure these people that my desire for me-time had nothing to do with them. Now that I’m older, I realize that’s not completely true.
The truth….two people will never want exactly the same thing. During my me-time, I don’t want to have to accommodate someone else. I only want to worry about me. So, sometimes during the week, I want to come home after work and take off my work clothes. I want to then lay around and eat whatever food happens to fall into my mouth. I may search Google for hours on end, or I may find weird/interesting things to watch on TV. I want to do all of this without someone’s judging eyes. I may want to zone out on FaceBook, Twitter, or text my friends continuously…I want to do it without you looking at me and thinking, I’m always on the phone.
Occasionally, I want a weekend to myself so I can sleep or stay in bed until whenever I want. Regardless of it’s a nice day, I want to watch TV and fall asleep on the couch off and on all day. Maybe I will clean, and maybe I won’t. Maybe I will shower, maybe I won’t. The point is, I can’t do any of these things hanging out with you. What if you’re bored, what if you don’t like what I’m watching, cooking, or not doing? What if you want to converse? It’s all of these things that make me-time special. So yes, it’s about me…but if it weren’t for you, and your independent needs, I wouldn’t need me-time.
A little something to make you feel better. The use of me-time has nothing to do with you directly. I love spending time with the people I love. I have fun with you, and definitely want to spend more time with you than I do away from you. My ability to have me-time will make our time together that much more enjoyable. Lack of me-time is like lack of food to some. I will get a headache, and inevitably become cranky. Then neither of us will have any fun.
So, next time I need some me-time, don’t take offense. Don’t worry about me. Give me my moment of space, that’s all I ask…it’s just a moment. And I will be back to my regularly scheduled program in no time. Probably sooner than you think.